June 14th, The Day After The Night Before
...Which was probably the Day before, ack-Time differences, who needs 'em? So, yesterday saw the trial of Michael Jackson come to a close, in which he was found not guilty on all counts. Of course he's not guilty...just like he was last time. Just goes to show that the magnificent US Justice System is very efficient when it comes to bribery, but hey, whatcha gonnna do? It was a media spectacle, and to be fair, thats all Jackson is these days.
My favourite moment from the trial was when the DA Thomas Mesereau announced to the court that Jackson was 'just a very bizzare character', which obviously meant he couldnt abuse kids, or give them alchohol doesn't it? Do you think the Traffic Cops would take that as an excuse? "Sir, we clocked you doin 120mph in a 30mph zone", "Ah, yes, erm, I'm just a bizzare person officer" "Ah, well in that case carry on, enjoy your day Sir". I think this last line could easily be replaced by "**Night-Stick to the head**"...
You know what bugs me though? No, you don't do you?! Well I'm going to tell you. It's those fucking "WE LOVE YOU MICHAEL" suporters of his, who spent every day outside that court because they love him so much. Dont these people have homes or jobs to go to? I also noticed that very few, if any of those Hard-Core (Seems sickeningly ironic) fans were older than Jackson. Very few looked older than Gavin Arvizo. Gavin Arvizo, the one who claimed to be raped. I think I know why these people love Michael so much...
In other Michael Jackson related news, Harvey Goldsmith has become my favourite man of the day. He's the promoter of Live8 if you didn't know, and when Jackson called to say "Erm, excuse me, I was, erm, wondering if I could, erm, Oooooh Pretty flowers, oh, erm, Michael was wondering if I could sing to the children at your Live8 show?", Goldsmith, knowing he was talking to the most famous and probably succesfull artist of all time (excluding myself of course), simply replied with "Okay, we'll, erm, consider it. Bye". Oh yes!
Lets all sit round the camp fire and sing in honour of Mr Harvey Goldsmith, honorary Demi-God untill further notice.
My favourite moment from the trial was when the DA Thomas Mesereau announced to the court that Jackson was 'just a very bizzare character', which obviously meant he couldnt abuse kids, or give them alchohol doesn't it? Do you think the Traffic Cops would take that as an excuse? "Sir, we clocked you doin 120mph in a 30mph zone", "Ah, yes, erm, I'm just a bizzare person officer" "Ah, well in that case carry on, enjoy your day Sir". I think this last line could easily be replaced by "**Night-Stick to the head**"...
You know what bugs me though? No, you don't do you?! Well I'm going to tell you. It's those fucking "WE LOVE YOU MICHAEL" suporters of his, who spent every day outside that court because they love him so much. Dont these people have homes or jobs to go to? I also noticed that very few, if any of those Hard-Core (Seems sickeningly ironic) fans were older than Jackson. Very few looked older than Gavin Arvizo. Gavin Arvizo, the one who claimed to be raped. I think I know why these people love Michael so much...
In other Michael Jackson related news, Harvey Goldsmith has become my favourite man of the day. He's the promoter of Live8 if you didn't know, and when Jackson called to say "Erm, excuse me, I was, erm, wondering if I could, erm, Oooooh Pretty flowers, oh, erm, Michael was wondering if I could sing to the children at your Live8 show?", Goldsmith, knowing he was talking to the most famous and probably succesfull artist of all time (excluding myself of course), simply replied with "Okay, we'll, erm, consider it. Bye". Oh yes!
Lets all sit round the camp fire and sing in honour of Mr Harvey Goldsmith, honorary Demi-God untill further notice.

8 Comments:
aww thats lovely darling!!
wot a delight to read :D ur soo talented.. i love u!! x x x
Frightfully amusing old chap! Do keep up the good work old boy.
Hope to see more of these soon :-)
Ciao
Ack, I forgot to make a post to tell you all to comment. Oh well, all comments before this point are now null and void. Pretend they dont exist...
Reminds me of the felling I get when I rip a cheese greater across my balls.
Only yanking your chain, enjoy your limelight bud.
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