Tuesday, June 14, 2005

June 14th, The Day After The Night Before

...Which was probably the Day before, ack-Time differences, who needs 'em? So, yesterday saw the trial of Michael Jackson come to a close, in which he was found not guilty on all counts. Of course he's not guilty...just like he was last time. Just goes to show that the magnificent US Justice System is very efficient when it comes to bribery, but hey, whatcha gonnna do? It was a media spectacle, and to be fair, thats all Jackson is these days.
My favourite moment from the trial was when the DA Thomas Mesereau announced to the court that Jackson was 'just a very bizzare character', which obviously meant he couldnt abuse kids, or give them alchohol doesn't it? Do you think the Traffic Cops would take that as an excuse? "Sir, we clocked you doin 120mph in a 30mph zone", "Ah, yes, erm, I'm just a bizzare person officer" "Ah, well in that case carry on, enjoy your day Sir". I think this last line could easily be replaced by "**Night-Stick to the head**"...
You know what bugs me though? No, you don't do you?! Well I'm going to tell you. It's those fucking "WE LOVE YOU MICHAEL" suporters of his, who spent every day outside that court because they love him so much. Dont these people have homes or jobs to go to? I also noticed that very few, if any of those Hard-Core (Seems sickeningly ironic) fans were older than Jackson. Very few looked older than Gavin Arvizo. Gavin Arvizo, the one who claimed to be raped. I think I know why these people love Michael so much...
In other Michael Jackson related news, Harvey Goldsmith has become my favourite man of the day. He's the promoter of Live8 if you didn't know, and when Jackson called to say "Erm, excuse me, I was, erm, wondering if I could, erm, Oooooh Pretty flowers, oh, erm, Michael was wondering if I could sing to the children at your Live8 show?", Goldsmith, knowing he was talking to the most famous and probably succesfull artist of all time (excluding myself of course), simply replied with "Okay, we'll, erm, consider it. Bye". Oh yes!
Lets all sit round the camp fire and sing in honour of Mr Harvey Goldsmith, honorary Demi-God untill further notice.

Saturday, June 11, 2005

Welcome One And All

...Come merrily into my Special Place

Before I explain why I'm here, I'd like to ask you a few questions; Who are you, and what do you think your doing touching that potted plant!? I'm kidding of course, I like you, you're cool, you've got style. Please, read on, flick through this Blog and leave wondering "What did I go in the Kitchen for again?"

Okay so enough about you, this place is about me, me, ME, and more importantly my interpretations of the World around me, and probably you too. If you're lucky I might make an effort to keep this vaguely tasteful, but I really doubt that, which for the people who I intend this blog for is a good thing.

My english teacher, (Mrs Thomas, Keep on reckon' Miss!) always told me to decide on your target audience from the offset, and identify that audience immediately. My audience for this lecture, and it is a lecture honest, is the open minded individual, or not individual-I don't discriminate against Siamese twins. Other than that, I don't care who you are as long as you leave a tip, but more importantly (Lies!) enjoy reading through my alternative view on the media, the World and Life.

Oh, and I guarantee I will tell you the meaning of Life, The Universe and Holland by the end of this Blogathon.

PS: I just spell checked this piece, and don't you think its slightly ironic that the Spell-Checker for a Blog site doesn't recognise the word Blog? Just me then? *cue rolling ball of straw*